This place is a little dusty

Hm. This place is a little dusty.

I bet you are wondering what on Earth I have been up to for the last 16 months! (Wow, that's a long time! Some people haven't even been alive for that long!) It is an incredible saga, and I think it is best told in the form of a story, complete with illustrations. The best format to approach such a series is no doubt a weekly serial. Some weeks we'll cover multiple months, some weeks we'll cover mere minutes—or even expand exponentially on a span of seconds for the moments of particular interest. Rest assured, we will cover it, until we catch up to the present.

It is a difficult race to run...

a race against time itself...

but we will persevere, and may even meet ourselves along the way.

-frank

P.S. Yes, jumjax™ (jumping jacks) have been a particularly important exercise during the global pandemic we are all going through. ("All" in this instance includes everyone except the astronauts on the International Space Station.) More on that later.

Must be on vacation

So I've had another three physical therapy sessions since my last post, and it is safe to say that I don't have a lot to report. By that I mean I didn't get a chance to share any jumjax™ information with the physical therapy staff.

On Friday, things went well again, but Emma wasn't there, so I couldn't inform her about the database, now hosted on IMDb. Things went so well, in fact, that they told me I wouldn't have to come to any more Friday sessions and would move to a Monday-Wednesday schedule going forward. That's ok with me, because my range of motion is returning rapidly, so I have no problem with that. And, as an aside, I've gotten pretty good at using crutches to get around. It's actually kind of fun in some ways--like constantly pole vaulting around! Along came Monday, and things went ok again, except still Emma wasn't there, and I thought to myself: Did I imagine her? What the heck! Maybe she isn't real! Good news, when I went and looked at the bulletin board in the hallway, her picture and name were posted on the wall. I definitely did not hallucinate her after my accident! After all, I was concussed and pretty badly beat up from being hit by a red Ford F-150 truck (2012). The bad news is she wasn't there Monday and she wasn't there today either. I tried talking with Scott about jumping jacks, but he just wasn't enthusiastic or laughing.

I'm not sure how many more sessions I will get to go to the Physical Therapy facility now that I am only going two days a week, but I really think the Jumjax™ Database could be a fun resource for physical therapists to use or just enjoy. The trouble is finding a physical therapist you gel with so you can share this kind of stuff!

Maybe next week. Counting down the hours.
-Frank

OK session

Got out of the house today for the first physical therapy session since release. It went OK. I'm scheduled for PT (Physical Therapy) on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays for the first 2 weeks, and then it will switch to just Mondays and Wednesdays until the cast comes off. Hopefully that will happen within a few weeks of that occurrence, at which point we'll reassess, naturally. I've got a great team of physical therapists working with me, and they are super positive and encouraging, and they really know their stuff. Big shout out to them making this entire ordeal a manageable experience. Emma wasn't there today so I didn't ask her about movies or even TV shows. (This would be a lead-in to me mentioning the Jumjax™ Database, which I think she would enjoy, maybe even if she isn't a fan of movies. As a physical therapist, it might be just the thing to help her discover her love of movies--seeing jumping jacks on the silver screen!) Scott was working with me today. He's not as good at banter. I said to him, "Scott Lang, big fan." He must have missed the reference though.

I will say this: I am getting better at using crutches going up and down stairs, which gives me much greater license to move around the house. At first I was sitting on my butt and moving one step at a time! Ha ha. Slow going, but the tortoise did beat the hare. Anyway I am now hopping up the stairs instead and it's way faster. I guess I'm a pretty quick innovator/learner, since it's just the 3rd day home. I do have to stop and rest part way up and down, so I try not to make too many trips during the day, but on the Physical Therapy guidelines it does say that it's important to be active and not just sit around all day.

Another day closer to normalcy. xxoo,

-Frank

On July 6th

On July 6th I was hit by a car. Sorry I have been away for so long. I have been in the hospital and rehabilitation facility undergoing treatment and rehabilitation for the severe muscle tears and "road burn" along the right side of my body, and for my left leg, which was broken in two places. I asked my dad to post on my blog to let everyone know what was going on, as he did when I spent time in jail, but he told me that I should "forget about the blog, this is serious. This is really serious, and you need to realize that this is real life. You don't have to post every day on some blog. It will be just fine if you miss a few days." I told him I hadn't been posting daily since 2018, and he said that wasn't the point, but I think he actually just didn't realize. I left it anyway, and to be honest quickly moved on from thinking about the blog at all. It was really serious. Let me back up a bit...

Between 3:30 and 3:40 pm on July 6th I was riding my bike across an intersection when a red Ford F-150 truck (2012) failed to stop at a light, which was also red. The truck careened into me at 35 miles per hour and sent me sprawling into the intersection (and did a pretty good number on my bike, too--that is to say, my bike is totaled). On the impact with the truck, my leg broke in two places; a partial break and a full break. I didn't know this at the time, and I don't remember anything from the moment of impact except a moment of extreme pain. I remember thinking I was probably dead. This was it. And it all happened so fast. My life happened so fast, not only the impact with the vehicle.

Luckily I was not dead. A United States Postal Carrier from the USPS was traveling in the southbound lane, and happened to be trained in first aid from their time working as a youth baseball coach for the city's recreation department. Suffice to say, it was an incredible series of lucky breaks for my incredibly unlucky breaks. The Carrier rushed to my aid and kept me stable until the paramedics arrived. I must admit I have never much liked the game of baseball, but now I see the great value it can provide to society.

I was transported via ambulance to the local hospital, where I underwent multiple scans and a, I am happy to report, successful surgery. As the doctors told me, I was extremely lucky. I didn't point out to them that I was also extremely unlucky to be hit by the red Ford F-150 truck (2012). I suppose it all balances out in the end, luck.

Keep in mind, I learned all this information second and even third hand. It is strange to know you can be a non-active participant in your own life, but here I am with no recollection of anything until waking up on July 7th in immense pain, bandages, and a cast.

Over the 3 weeks that followed, I was in constant discomfort. I have never suffered a broken bone or a severe injury before, and I have never spent time in a hospital and rehabilitation center, but now I have experienced both. The pain became more manageable by the day, but the worst part is the sitting around. The inability to move and exercise at the level you are accustomed to. I could no longer (and still can not) do a jumping jack. This is the ideal exercise, and it has been taken from me. There is a lot to adjust to. 

Today is my first day back at home. I am using crutches to get around, but don't imagine I'll be doing much getting around. I've not got much energy. The weeks ahead will be long, but Emma from the rehab center told me that it is really impressive the progress I have made so far, which is encouraging to hear. I told her about jumping jacks being the ideal exercise and she laughed and agreed and then I said I liked to shorten it by calling them "jumjax" which she seemed to like. I am thinking about telling her about the Jumjax™ Database, but I don't know if she would think that was cool or not. I'm not sure if she likes movies. I am still in discomfort, but hopefully in a few weeks when I can lose the crutches things will get easier. I've almost regained full motion of my arm, but my body still feels slow. It's just tough, it really is.

Thanks for reading.

-Frank

just stopping by to say hey, can't stay long

hey everyone,

it is me again, frank from JUL 11th. no, not today, haha. well.. it is technically today for you. for me it is JUL 11th 2018, not JUL 11th 2019.

I hope that all is well with you and yours. hard to believe I'm setting foot one year into the future...I don't imagine many other humans have achieved something like this! I've been zipping and zapping around through time and, like I said, I really can't stay long, because there are a lot of places I want to go, but I'm short on time to visit them all! 10 years from now? yep. think bigger. 100? why not. and bigger. 1,000?! yes. all of you will be dead, and I'll still be out here exploring time, and meeting all kinds of people. your children, maybe. your children's children's children. the robotic programs who survive longer then even them.

anyways, I'm going out of town tomorrow (that's my tomorrow, not your tomorrow) on a long trip out into nature, and I guess the strange thing about it is that you will know all about the outcome, and I won't know a thing about it, yet I get to go further into the future than any human has gone before! time travel really makes my head spin. definitely advantages and disadvantages to being in both situations. I think I'd take mine over yours, though... the vastness of time laid out before me, to explore to my heart's content.

other frank: remember, I've been to the past and I'm heading to the future as well, just like you. our paths will cross again! see you there! fnb community: it is good to see you all in good health and enjoying yourselves. keep it up.

we will see each other again,

-frank (sched.)

Monday Minute 014

The Monday Minute! is a new series that will provide weekly updates for loyal readers on the titles that have been added to the Jumjax™ Database and our newly accessible IMDb tracking lists.

Jumjax™ Database: New Additions

The Monday Minute! posts have been accidentally growing into Monday Multiple Minutes!, so efforts have been made to reign in the total length and cut to the chase. If it takes more than a minute to read about the newly added titles, that's false branding. Being concise is key with these sort of things.

• Films and Television Shows That Utilize Jumping Jacks
• Films and Television Shows That Do Not Utilize Jumping Jacks

The newly added titles are:

Paths of Glory (1957) - 88 minutes

A war without sense, a war without soldiers training (or even blowing off some steam) by knocking out some jumping jacks. Negligent officers. My men would have taken the Ant Hill. 1/10. Not recommended.

Max (2015) - 111 minutes

No jumping jacks in another movie with bad soldiers. I did enjoy the bike tricks, and obviously dog marines are heroes, but I cannot recommend this film. 1/10. Not recommended.

[Akira Kurosawa's] Dreams (1990) - 119

I was thinking a dream sequence would be the perfect place for jumping jacks, but then I realized I have never personally dreamed about jumping jacks... Suppose I can't hold it against Mr. Kurosawa. He could have included them anyway and no one would have known if it was really something he dreamed. 1/10. Not recommended.

I just timed myself and it took me 47 seconds to read about the new titles. (And I purposefully read them slowly, too.) Also, all three of these movies focus on the horrors of war--another week with a cool theming bonus.

xxoo, always yours

-Frank

Monday Minute 013

The Monday Minute! is a new series that will provide weekly updates for loyal readers on the titles that have been added to the Jumjax™ Database and our newly accessible IMDb tracking lists.

Jumjax™ Database: New Additions

Finally watched some movies this week after two weeks off. You're gonna wanna see the results!

• Films and Television Shows That Utilize Jumping Jacks
• Films and Television Shows That Do Not Utilize Jumping Jacks

The newly added titles are as follows:

Howard the Duck (1986) - 110 minutes

I think Howard the Duck (1986) has a lot of very good and very important things going on, but, unfortunately, it is missing something vital: a grounding in reality. Howard makes use of some impressive "quack fu" maneuvers, but it feels like he doesn't do anything to earn them, such as training exercises, which cheapens the outcome. 1/10. Not recommended.

Funky Monkey (2004) - 94 minutes

Now this is good cinema. Suave secret agents, a high-speed high-stakes skateboard chase, American Football, coming of age story elements, big laughs, a new dad. The young boy Michael starts the film as a piece of trash worthless nerd who sucks at American Football and talking to girls, but all that changes after a great training regimen (which includes jumping jacks) is implemented by Michael's new brave father figure, agent McCall, the perfect match for Michael's computer programmer mom. Did I mention the super simian soldier, Clemens? This ape was also trained by agent McCall, and since we know McCall's training regimens include jumping jacks, it's no wonder this ape keeps on kicking. By the end of the film, we see Michael's dynamic training pays off in the long run. An instant classic. 9/10. Recommended. Jumjax™ timestamp: 53'

Men in Black: International (2019) - 131

We capped the week off with a feature combining the space elements and the threat of the imminent destruction of the Earth from Howard the Duck (1986) with the agent elements from Funky Monkey (2004). Unfortunately lacking any jumping jack activity. Should have taken more inspiration from the playbook of Funky Monkey (2004) and included some agent training exercises, especially as Agent M (Molly (Tessa Thompson)) is an agent in training. 1/10. Not recommended.

I guess taking some time off was exactly the recharge needed to get back into the hunt. That's another one confirmed in the books that utilizes jumping jacks. 1 out of 3 this week--not a bad return.

xxoo, always yours

-Frank

None-day Minute

I haven't watched a single flick this week, so, unfortunately, I can't update you on updates to the database, or the lists hosted on IMDb, but feel free to look back at past weeks or even go back and watch a movie off the "jumping jacks confirmed" list.

On the bright side, sometimes it's nice to turn off your screens and get some sunshine, especially in summer (which it is now in the northern hemisphere). Get it? Bright side? Sunshine? Ha ha, just a little joke. If you do switch off your screens, be sure to switch on your sun screens. Ok! OK, I'll stop! Ha ha.

always yours, xxoo
-Frank

Monday Minute 012

The Monday Minute! is a new series that will provide weekly updates for loyal readers on the titles that have been added to the Jumjax™ Database and our newly accessible IMDb tracking lists.

Jumjax™ Database: New Additions

Keep grindin'.

• Films and Television Shows That Utilize Jumping Jacks
• Films and Television Shows That Do Not Utilize Jumping Jacks

The newly added titles are as follows:

Tough Guys Don't Dance (1987) - 110 minutes

Tough guys may not dance, but I imagine most of them have a regimen of activities to keep themselves physically fit, which, if they have any brain between their ears, would include the best exercise for all essential muscle groups--the jumping jack. A lack of tough guys in this one in my humble opinion. Plenty of dancing all over the place though. 1/10. Not recommended.

Delgo (2008) - 89 minutes

Some animated hijinks but no animated jumjax™. Delgo (2008) has some interesting world building pieces, but lacks in the full puzzle being put together. If I could have seen the first draft I think I really could have helped them out. How do these warriors of the Lockni and Nohrin (and Ando) stay prepared for battle? Why don't we see Delgo himself training to do all the acrobatics he does? Perhaps a few jumping jacks to limber up first? You know what's next. 1/10. Not recommended.

Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019) - 131

I hardly think Godzilla being a white blood cell of the living Earth makes a lick of sense, but even if you are willing to suspend that disbelief to watch the movie, it never gets explored further. It would be like if during Osmosis Jones (2001) they told you he was a white blood cell and then totally ignored that he was a white blood cell fighting viruses with the help of his crime fighting partner Drix. They should have mentioned more that Ghidorah was a virus that Earth caught and made it sick. And that humans aren't so much a viral infection, but more like bacteria, of which your body needs a healthy balance working in harmony, especially for gastro-intestinal health, but with too many bacteria in the wrong places, things can get dangerous. That's why the white blood cells are so important! At the very least, show us how Godzilla trains to stay fit enough to fight all these monsters. 1/10. Not recommended.

Yojimbo (1961) - 110

Another samurai flick with strong characters but lacking in training sequences. The dueling crime bosses could easily have had their hired swords doing jumping jacks to stay fit for the coming battle. 1/10. Not recommended.

Every movie watched is another step closer to a complete database.

xxoo, always yours

-Frank